This morning I woke up at 5:30am with an uneasy feeling in my stomach. This is not the first time I travel nor will it be the last but the fact that I was leaving for such a long time made me very uneasy. It made me uneasy to leave my brothers behind. I have always been there for them, to help them when applying for jobs or the university. I felt like I was leaving recklessly when my family needs me the most. I tend to be everyone’s go to person in my family. The one that always comes up with a solution or the one that gets consulted every decision even though I sometimes don’t even have a clue myself!
Yet, when it was time to say goodbye and a knot started forming in my throat it was because I kept thinking what are they going to do without me or I without them. I managed to keep it together and waved goodbye until they were out of sight. We have been each others support for so long imagining the next 10 months without them seems impossible.
I am currently on a layover in Charlotte, NC, as I wait for my flight to Madrid, Spain at 8 p.m.